Weddings can be expensive, some people simply don’t want to be the centre of attention, and COVID-19 has made changes to big events. Micro weddings, ironically, are the next big thing in the bridal world.
(4.5 minutes to read)
What is a micro wedding?
A micro wedding is one which has fewer than 20 guests in attendance. It differs from eloping in that a micro wedding usually still has a party afterwards and it’s not a secret, while an elopement is usually something only the bride and groom know about. For many couples, it’s the perfect compromise; a wedding without the price tag or drama.
Why have a micro wedding?
There are many reasons that people are choosing micro weddings.
COVID-19: Despite NZ being relatively isolated from the pandemic, there were a few months of uncertainty. Even now, international guests have to jump through many very expensive hoops in order to attend. The world has changed the way it views crowds, and weddings are no different. Some people are also opting for a micro wedding now, with a promise for a big party in the future once the virus is less of a threat.
Cost: Weddings, even the cheap ones, require a lot of money. The average wedding cost in NZ is around $30,000 (that’s a lot of avocado on toast). Couples are increasingly reprioritising; do you want a house or another round of renovations? Are you privately funding IVF? Maybe you’d simply rather spend your money on a holiday. Regardless, some people would rather spend their hard earned cash somewhere else.
The centre of attention? No thanks: Some couples are not interested in throwing a big party, getting dressed up, confessing their love for one another in front of everyone, and being the centre of attention. Cutting – hacking- back a guest list can be fraught with social expectations too, having to invite Great Aunt Mavis and your cousin’s annoying kids even though you really don’t want them there.
The benefits of a micro wedding
Think of the money and time you’ll save. Instead of a huge party, it’s just you two, your celebrant, and those you dearly love in a park or garden somewhere. Then a meal at a nice restaurant— a breeze to organise and saving buckets of money.
Also, you literally only have those you truly want there. Parents, siblings, and your best mates. That’s it. Reducing a guest list so dramatically means there’s no room for arguments about inviting distant family, because the excuse ‘it’s literally just our immediate family’ is true.
Ask any bride or groom about their day, and they’ll probably mention that they didn’t get to spend any time with their guests; with 60-100 people, you’re really only going to have five minutes with most people. A micro wedding means you can have genuine, quality time with your guests. More than just a rushed selfie before heading onto the next well-wisher.
How to Plan a Micro Wedding
The beauty of a micro wedding is that literally anything goes. If you want to wear a wedding dress, carry a bouquet, have table decorations, then you can. If you don’t, then… don’t. While there are certain things you must have in NZ to be legally binding nuptials, everything else is up to you.
- Who are you inviting? This should actually be a simple step, literally just those in your immediate circle.
- Where will you get married? A small wedding can be in your backyard, at an AirBnB, a local park, or…. Anywhere.
- The only legal requirement in NZ for a binding marriage is the presence of an officiant for the vows.
- Will you have a reception? Yeah, or nah?
- Plan your vendor list. It’s simple with that reduction in numbers, as it’s easier to stray from traditional expectations. A tea length Etsy gown is just as accepted as that Cinderella-Magic-Fairy-Gown, a jumpsuit, or a whimsical boho chic bridesmaid dress in a floaty sky blue. You do you.
Things to think about when planning a micro wedding
Small guest list means people might get upset
Even though you literally are only inviting your dog and your brother, there will be people who will be upset or sad that you did not invite them. Have a plan for how you’re going to tell them. While you don’t have to explain yourself, it’s good to have line that you and your future spouse can use.
Make it your day
A micro wedding means you can pick and choose what you want to do and which traditions to keep. If you want a wedding party, you can. If you don’t want a cake, but still want to splurge on a wedding photographer, that’s up to you. There are no rules here any more. Both you and spouse can choose three non-negotiables for the day; what is important to you. You prioritise those things; dress, car and videographer? Or helicopter ride, flowers and two bridesmaids?
The best thing about a micro wedding is the lack of expectations and rules. The people you invite are those you love the most, and know you the best. This is truly a wedding that’s all about you two, promising to spend the rest of your lives together.